Break my promise (again) to post every week. However, I am trying to post as frequently as possible. So much changed since 2022 came, I live on my own (again) now. It's very hard to leave the comfort of the home, especially from my family. However, sooner or later I need to grow and leave them anyway. Finally, my struggles in university almost ended. My joy, tears, friendship, struggles, and other feelings just flow like a wind in mere time. Time really is fast. Now, I'm a few months closer to my graduation day. But still, I need to finish my paper first hehe. Since I moved out I struggle with depression and loneliness. Those feelings make it really hard to concentrate on the things I am doing. My brain tried to deny it, but my heart did otherwise. I feel trapped and just run in the circle of sober and sad. I'm tired to find someone to erase those feelings, need to stand alone and do what I wanna do, no stalking, no finding, just me. Yeah easy to say but hard to do. From this point, I will try to stop finding a partner to erase those feeling, gotta be strong and erase those by myself. Sad indeed, when they do not really care about you, but I know who I am, I know I'm not attractive. But is it wrong to expect something?
Valentine has come again this year, a gloomy day for a lonely laddie like me indeed. My social media is full of peeps showing their partner here and there. Every day I always think how my life will be if I had one, they wake me every day, eat or cook together, or perhaps I could make a song for them. However, thinking about that would not make me a stronger person, it is a childish thought. I have nothing to offer either, probably I need to catch my dream or be a better person first before I start finding it. Nah, who needs that when you have yourself.
Wisdom this week:
Dream higher, you will be stronger if u did and life is about the climb. Be yourself love will come to you.
Burst your limit to unknown space
